ryaynross:

im laughing so much a group of really loud boys sat down next to us in mcdonalds and one of them just picked up his burger and said to his friends “i bet i can put this whole thing in my mouth” and my mom turned to me and said “well we know who the gay one is” and they heard her and none of them have said a word since

"I’m not into guys. will I figure it out and like investigate? yeah! that’s life. like, I can understand will… because I took the time to understand will."

its:

going:

down:

i’m

yelling

timber

neptunain:

what if you tried to call off of work and you are just like “im sick today” and your boss was like “i know dude you’re one of the sickest bros here” and you were like “no i mean it im ill” and your boss says “yeah you the illest” 

cistro:

Am i a womfn? Am i a womfn?

cassadragon:

WHAT THE HECK

illumahottie:

How To Get Away Without Having An Upper Lip

Birthday Countdown [four days] >> can't get you out of my head.

memefuckery:

intellectualpizza:

memefuckery:

I had a hermit crab and a dollhouse…..

SWEET BABY JESUS I THOUGHT IT WAS A NORMAL HOUSE AND YOU HAD SOME SORT OF HUGE ASS CRUSTACEAN LIVING IN IT AND I ALMOST PASSED OUT

It’s okay, like 12 other people thought that